HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize
