were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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