so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I could fuck to npr.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
