She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
