so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
