That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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