HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Holy sore nipples Batman
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize