butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
