Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Damn victory sex feels great
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
