the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I love having hate sex.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Randomize
