not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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