I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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