Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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