how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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