yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
