sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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