is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
