But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
