I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
