why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
