I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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