I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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