I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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