dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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