my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
