if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
So vagazzling was a success
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize