just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Randomize
