let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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