Three words: puerto rican gang bang
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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