I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
The best walk of shames are on the highway
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
