were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
