Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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