This dress was meant to end up on your floor
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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