I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
