6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
