can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
So many bounce houses so little time
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
