Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I've blown a few things in my day
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
