Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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