cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
