Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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