im having a threesome with these popsicles
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
