i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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