The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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