I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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