just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
