just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I just made out with a guy for $7.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
There are leaves in my underwear?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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