I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize