I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
