Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
