i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
